Exactly a year ago today, the world lost a light that was Malaysian actor Ashraf Sinclair. But beyond the fact that he was a public figure, the late Ashraf Sinclair was a beloved son, brother, husband and father. Following his sudden passing, his wife, Indonesian singer and actress Bunga Citra Lestari (BCL) had to shoulder on, for herself and for their young son. Now, in a six-part interview conducted by TV host and former MTV VJ Daniel Mananta, BCL opened up about life without her husband: before and after BCL met Sinclair, his final days, as well as how she plans to continue stepping forward.
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BCL shared of Sinclair’s passing,
“When he passed, I was able to accept that my husband was gone. I couldn’t even cry because it (Ashraf’s passing) didn’t feel real. But for some reason I still hoped that it was just a nightmare. Even until today, there are times when I have to pinch myself, just to make sure that it wasn’t just a nightmare,”
For months after Sinclair’s passing, BCL admitted to having insomnia, a direct result of anxiety born from the fear of losing her loved ones while she slept. There was also the regret of not having spent enough time with her husband, to whom she got married in 2008.
“It was like this, I was always running and running. But upon reflection, I wondered why I had been running around all this time? What have I been chasing? If I had known that the time between me and him would only be 12 years, maybe my priorities would also have changed,”
However, BCL does not wish to dwell on the past, nor does she wish to condemn fate for what has happened.
“It never crossed my mind to be angry with fate. For as long as I have lived, I have been thought to accept whatever situation is presented to me. In whatever that has happened, acceptance is important. Only then can we move on to the next stage.”
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The beloved ‘Gol & Ginchu’ actor passed away from a heart attack at the young age of 40. The multitalented actor, model and television host leaves behind BCL and their young son, Noah.
Our hearts and love go out to BCL, Noah and the family and friends of the late actor.
*Cover image credits: Instagram / @bclsinclair
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